Monthly Archives: June 2001

Back in Chicago. Will be in Sacramento next week. Ahh, the whirlwind life of a jetsetter.

I am beginning to run out of cash. Clients are late on their payments and the bills are beginning to pile on. If I had personal savings, I could float the company bills on my dime, but those days are over as I am tapped out.

It’s time I seriously started a job hunt. Seriously. I need to get my finances in order. Damage has already begun.

I can see the road before me. I have been walking in the dark, feeling my way between rocks and gutters, and now a bright moon hides the shadows that covered my eyes. If I wanted to, I could drive to Canada — and come back.

My life is no longer in limbo. It’s not that my future is suddenly clear, it is that my future is suddenly available for speculation. How wonderful it is to know the positive uncertainty.

I am writing this from The Oregonian, a paper I interned at about four years ago. I miss the team work, the deadline, the creativity. What a wonderful group of people I had working with me.

Tonight, I am in Portland, Oregon, enjoying the company of dear friends. Tonight, I have learned that justice will do as promised. Tonight, I am free as I ever wanted to be. I am free to be equal. I am free to be able to raise my immigrant head to see the heavy hand of the INS lifted out of my sky. I would like to celebrate, not by exerting those freedoms, but to stand still and feel the lightness that covers my heart. To be free to feel God’s will in my life.

If you don’t know what I am referring to, I will soon make it clear to you.

For those of you who know, thank you.

I put it my first serious resume today and I am still contemplating a career in architecture. I hope my food supply doesn’t run out before I find a job.


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